Welcome to Component #2 of ‘The t.r.i.p Concept’: “Reality”
Reality Defined: “Reality is the state of things as they actually exist, rather than as they may appear or might be imagined. In a wider definition, reality includes everything that is and has been, whether or not it is observable or comprehensible. A still broader definition includes everything that has existed, exists, or will exist.” In addition, it all means everything that appears to our five senses: Hearing, Sight, Touch, Smell, and Taste.
To get to the truth, the bottom line and glean the answers or solutions that you need for any situation you must first understand your reality and what your expectations are.
Reality Check: There are always, at least, three realities in any event or situation. There’s yours, there’s the person’s reality who’s sitting across from you and then there’s the reality of the inanimate object, event or situation. You must be aware of this “truth” and be prepared to consider it wholeheartedly when involved in any situation or event. For more on the “Three Realities,” please read my article here on www.Itsallpossible.com, titled “How to Cope, Survive and Thrive On Your Personal or Business Success Quest”
You do not need to consider the other two realities until after you know what’s “real” to you. At that point, as you start to march forward, is the time for you to be on the look-out for clues as to what the other sides reality is and then determine what the reality is of the situation or event.
If you find that all three participants are functioning in the same reality, that would be the time to shift towards a closing and making it a happy ending. If not, dial it back and dig some more.
If you do not know the other two realities, there will be no closing and if there is, there will certainly be no happy ending for all.
To Reiterate and Accentuate from Part 1 . . .Truth vs Reality:
In life or in business, it’s a battle to get the truth! It’s even more difficult to recognize and agree on the actual Reality.
It all has to do with the oscillating relationship between Truth and Reality . . . What’s fact, what’s fiction? What’s real and what’s not real? In their personal and professional lives, ordinary people often conflate reality with truth. The challenge lies in the fact that the interchangeable use of “truth” and “reality” and vice versa is pretty widespread.
For purposes of my blog, this is my reality and my truth. At the risk of sounding arrogant, I must emphatically suggest that you consider following my lead and my thinking. 64 Years of both brilliant and not so brilliant experience, being mentally bruised and battered and then some, living with the results and consequences of too much trial and error, millionaire and then I’m not, all lead me to this point:
- Truth is an absolute whereas reality can be different depending on the individual.
- Different people may perceive the reality of a given situation differently and there is always one, and only one, version of the truth for that situation.
- Reality is something you can enter into negotiations with. Truth represents the hard facts, and is not negotiable, and always hides behind the Reality.
- Reality and Truth–the former can sometimes have shades of gray, the latter is always black and white.
In the beginning of any undertaking, event, project or negotiations nothing matters more than you being acutely aware that this dichotomy exists. You must be cognizant of the fact that this transposition is often the stumbling block to achieving success and/or accomplishing win/win solutions in your business and personal life. Moving Forward . . .
A little about me:
In addition to my beliefs regarding Truth vs. Reality there are a few things you need to know about me and the way I approach “my reality” and my life, before we advance towards the finish line.
This background will help you understand where I’m coming from and in all cases, if you’re comfortable, you’ll be able to embrace and adopt my distinct way of coping with reality . . . or not.
1- I don’t care about “what was”: The past is not a place I hang out in. I pull whatever lessons that I can and then move on. All my memories are intact and mean a lot to me. I keep them all but I just don’t save every dance for them.
2– I fantasize and daydream but I don’t live there 24/7: If I need them I usually visit them when I go to bed, when I’m in the bathroom (too much information?) or driving. Besides, I have a vivid imagination and an obsessive personality. This combination could lead to intense fantasies where it’s easy for me to get lost on any personal or business level.
3- I always deal with reality upfront no matter how painful: My sense of urgency on a scale of 1-10 is a 12.5 and rising as I get really old. I’ve learned that leaving reality out there unchecked without parental or grown up supervision and guidance always, and I stress always, enables it to become a cataclysm that leaves so much devastation in its path that the ramifications last for days, months and yes, even years.
4- 12.5 out of a 1-10 scale of sense of urgency? . . .I now naturally embrace this level of intense thinking described in #3. I make this part of who I am. It inspires, motivates but more than anything it “scares” me into acting now, not later, but now. When I get scared I become extremely proactive.
- I’ve been in the Fashion business for over 30 years. Things change hour to hour and in apparel manufacturing everything that can go wrong usually does go wrong. Too many times I’ve witnessed what appeared to be an innocuous and minor situation that, in hindsight, was clearly underestimated and handled with a” cavalier attitude” thus culminating in huge financial losses.
5- Thanks to the fashion business: my 12.5 sense of urgency now comes to me naturally and being proactive has become a deeply ingrained habit.
6– In making decisions: I meet with my intuition and the qualitative and quantitative parts of my brain. “We” use a very “sophisticated” formula to determine upfront if something will move forward, not move at all and/or just implode or explode:
This formula is difficult for most people to grasp and that’s why we’re always needlessly, carelessly and unnecessarily “bumped” into by unwelcomed, disrespectful human invaders. It seems to, especially and annoyingly, happen at moments when we’re in hot pursuit of business and/or life success and trying our damnedest to attract and have extremely desirable opportunities “bump” into us.
- The formula? Okay, Okay, you twisted my arm!!! I usually sell this formula for $29.99 but today . . . Only Kidding!!! Here it is: Good Action= Good Reaction Bad Action=Bad Reaction
- When this simple formula is evenly weighted as shown, everything is beautiful. The outcome for any situation has a great chance to be a win-win for all sides involved. When the formula starts to become fluid and starts to become mobile that’s when the proverbial shit will hit the fan. Good action=Bad reaction for example guarantees someone is going to be disappointed, will get upset, get screwed, get angry and maybe even get even. There’s rarely a happy ending when the formulas are out of alignment.
GREAT ADVICE ALERT: “Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don’t resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.” ― Lao Tzu
I’m 64 years old but my mind’s eye still “sees” an 18-year-old. Everything’s working fine and everything’s in tip-top shape. On a scale of 1-10 my ambition level is 12.75 and my energy level is 12.85.
I was 10 years old when I started out selling the Sunday New York Daily News and the New York Daily Mirror door to door. I lived in Brooklyn, New York and grew up living in the Linden Public Housing Projects.
I’ve been an Entrepreneur for 54 years. 30 of those years were in the fashion business as a Ladies Private Label Apparel Manufacturer.
I’ve always been very successful but today, not so successful. I didn’t lose it I just let it slip away. I uncharacteristically and painfully gave up on life and now, I’m rebuilding my life with renewed mental and physical soundness, strength and endurance.
I’ve done some incredibly smart things in my life and some dumb things in my life.There are so many lessons I’ve learned and today, I’m almost an expert on knowing what I don’t know. I’m learning new things every single day about myself and about life. I know so many people. I know extremely wealthy people who have held on to their millions and their success and I know people who have not.
THE POINT?
The information I lay out and share is not guesswork and it’s not found on the pages of the books of the so-called success gurus. It’s all based on practical, real life hands on experience of hundreds of successful men and woman I know. It’s based on what I learned becoming a millionaire and a successful businessman and then letting it slip away. More on my background at a later date. Thanks for listening.
THE OTHER POINT?
Here is a suggested step by step guide to working with the facts and developing an accurate view of what your reality truly is made up of.
To put it another way, it’s a step by step guide on “How to work through to your Reality and move forward towards your goal, your dreams or just solving a problem or a situation”:
Step #1- “Open Your Eyes”
Well, what did you expect? Just simply “open” them. “Open” them to what’s all around you and beyond. It really is that simple if you want answers bad enough. It’s the only way to start. I’m talking about your “Mind’s Eye.”
Your “Mind’s Eye” needs to “panoramically see” the world in order for it to be able to absorb the energy and potentiality from those visions that gain entry. The energy and potentiality from those visions, in turn, enables you to process and transform them into the information and the knowledge that you need, in order to discern the reality that exists, within and beyond the borders and boundaries of your sphere of influence.
In effect, “opening” your “Minds Eye”, gives you the link that you need to explore and experiment, in order to effectively view your reality. It enables you to go out and make the world your playground.
Step #2- Keep it simple and Break it down.
Ask yourself questions. Write down your answers.
Key questions:
- What am I seeing as my Reality?
- What do I know to be true in this situation? How about what’s a lie or unadulterated horse shit?
- What’s the worst that could happen to me if . . .?
- What am I feeling?
- Ask as many questions as you can think of about your particular situation using Who, What, Where, When, Why and How.
The most important point to remember is that you need to write down all your answers so that you’re able to review and study them and “see” them for what they really mean, reveal and /or represent. . . Reality or Not Reality? Truth or Lie?
SideBar: Please see my article located on this blog: “Questions & Shredding: The Most Powerful Tool in Your Success Support Arsenal is Free and Available 24/7. Are You Using it?”
Step #3- Your emotions and Reality: Knowing what you’re feeling will make the exploration of your reality that much more enjoyable, accurate and satisfying.
Everything that you say, do or think about is connected and influenced with one or more of your emotions.
This is a lengthy discussion that we’ll explore in future posts but for now it’s crucial for you to at least recognize and understand what your feeling, in your search for the information you need. Not knowing what you’re feeling could set you in directions that are hurtful to you, and the outcome you want to effect.
Myrko Thum created a cheat sheet for all of us to figure out what we’re feeling (please see below). http://www.myrkothum.com/emotions
It’s difficult to pinpoint exactly what you’re feeling especially if it’s several emotions at one time. Reviewing both positive and negative written emotions will help you “see” and verbalize what’s happening.
Please review the negative emotions list as well. I don’t like that they’re classified and labeled as “negative” as if they’re there to hurt or impede your success quest.
I believe that all our emotions are there to help and guide us. I believe that “negative “emotions keep us safe and are there to warn us and alert us to general and specific life situations that are minor to life threatening.
View all your emotions as friends. They’re not there to harm you. Some friends we like more than others and we have different friends for different occasions and life events e.g. drinking buddies, shopping friends and friends with benefits.
List of Positive Emotions
Abundant | Anticipation | Aroused | Attractive |
Awe | Comfortable | Compassion | Confident |
Connected | Contentment | Ecstasy | Enthusiasm |
Euphoria | Energized | Entertained | Excited |
Freedom | Fulfilled | Grateful | Happy |
Harmony | Hopeful | Inspired | Interested |
Joy | Love | Motivated | Optimistic |
Passionate | Peaceful | Powerful | Productive |
Proud | Relaxed | Safety | Satisfied |
Serenity | Strong | Successful | Wealthy |
Wise |
List of Negative Emotions
Abused | Alone | Annoyed | Angry |
Anxious | Ashamed | Bored | Concerned |
Confused | Depressed | Deceived | Disappointed |
Disconnected | Discouraged | Disgust | Drained |
Dread | Embarrassed | Empty | Envy |
Exhausted | Fearful | Frustration | Greed |
Grief | Guilty | Helpless | Hopeless |
Humiliated | Hurt | Impatient | Inadequate |
Inferior | Insecure | Intimidated | Hate |
Loathing | Lonely | Moody | Numb |
Overwhelmed | Passive | Pressure | Rage |
Rejected | Remorse | Resentment | Revenge |
Sad | Uncertain | Unfulfilled | Unloved |
Unmotivated | Unsatisfied | Unsupported | Unworthy |
Vulnerable | Worthless | Worn Out | Worried
|
Step 4- Action– move forward with the facts in hand and try to reach the outcome you desire. If you’re uncomfortable and it’s not going the way you want . . . just retreat. This is not giving up. This is not losing or surrendering. This is collecting your thoughts and saving your strength for a later time or date.
Know one thing . . . You’re allowed to change your mind. That may not be the other sides reality but I say, screw them, it’s your reality and at the moment that’s all that matters.
These steps should get you on the right track by supporting and guiding you in determining what your reality is and also what your expectations really are.
Good Luck. Stay safe out there. Never give up on your dreams.
Thank you for taking the time to read my article. I hope it helps you.
Please feel free to explore and read ‘The t.r.i.p Concept’ and the ‘The i.m.a.p.p Concept.’
At the end of this post, for your convenience, there are direct links to each part of “The t.r.i.p Concept” and “The i.m.a.p.p Concept.
The two concepts, a total of 9 separate components, are made up of a total of 170 pages with approx. 44,000 words. Each component is easy to read and they’re meant to be independently reviewed slowly and deliberately.
If you go to the top of the home page for www.itsallpossible.com , you’ll see the two concepts listed and each one has a drop down that lists the components and allows for you to access one component at a time.
Here’s how it lays out:
“The t.r.i.p Concept”: Part #1-Truth; Part #2- Reality; Part #3- Inspiration; Part #4- Positivity
“The i.m.a.p.p Concept”: Part #1-Inspiration; Part #2-Motivation; Part #3- Action; Part #4-People; Part # 5- Persistence.”
Your Success Support Arsenal: ‘The t.r.i.p Concept’ gets you to the starting gate; ‘The i.m.a.p.p Concept’ gets you to the finish line.
- Phase 1: The t.r.i.p Concept: Truth + Reality + Inspiration+ Positivity
- Phase 2: The i.m.a.p.p Concept: Inspiration + Motivation + Action + People + Persistence
- Phase 3: The two concepts begin working in tandem and now in phase 3 they’re all working together. Combining all the components in both concepts creates a firm foundation for a very compelling Success Support Arsenal.
I welcome all comments. Actually, your feedback would be greatly appreciated. Raw or well done, I’ll take it all.
Direct Links to Each Part of “The t.r.i.p Concept” & “The i.m.a.p.p Concept”
“The t.r.i.p Concept”: This Concept Will Get You to The Starting Gate.
Part #1 Truth: “The t.r.i.p Concept”
Part #2 Reality: “The t.r.i.p Concept”
Part #3 Inspiration: “The t.r.i.p Concept”
Part #4 Positivity: “The t.r.i.p Concept”
“The i.m.a.p.p Concept”: This Concept Will Get You to the Finish Line.
Part #1 Inspiration Too: “The i.m.a.p.p Concept”
Part #2 Motivation: “The i.m.a.p.p Concept”
Part #3 Action: “The i.m.a.p.p Concept”
Part #4 People: “The i.m.a.p.p Concept”
Part #5 Persistence: “The i.m.a.p.p Concept”
Once again, thank you very much for stopping by and if you have any questions or advice, please feel free to email me at [email protected]
Extra Stuff- My concepts and all the articles I’ll write, are all backed by:
- Over 55 years of “street” experience.
- Over 40 years of starting and building physical, virtual world and internet businesses.
- Over 40 years of starting and building many different types of businesses.
- Becoming a millionaire and then “turning my back” and “walking” away from it. I’m much stronger now than I was then and I know exactly what I did wrong. I’m working on getting it back. Please feel free to come along with me on my Success Quest and I hope that you bring your Success Quest along as well. I would love the company and besides, I have many powerful and impactful teachable moments to share.
- Knowing hundreds and hundreds of wealthy and/or successful men and woman over 60.
- Knowing hundreds and hundreds of wealthy and/or successful men and women under 60
- Knowing thousands of successful people from all around the world through face to face networking, social media and as serving as President of Macaby Group, an international company.
- Started, and never stopped, reading and studying about Positivity and Success back in 1975 as a young Stockbroker trainee for a brokerage company named E.F. Hutton. They gave us the book, “Think and Grow Rich” by Napoleon Hill, to read and study as part of our training program.
- Dreamed of being rich since 1962, when I was 10 years old and when my father left for the first time. He left a total of 3 times. Finally, he was gone for good the third time. You know the saying . . .
- My attitude: “You may see me struggle but you will never see me quit.”
- Over 40 years of doing many smart things and doing some very dumb things. Huge lessons learned.
- I’m a good “beginner” and I’ve learned many, many, many things from my over 40 years of mistakes and missteps.
Please read my “about” page for more information and visit:
My Facebook Pages:
www.facebook.com/barry.sarner If you’re an animal lover, please come meet 5000 other animal loving friends on my Facebook page.
www.positivemessagesuniverse.com Need some positivity? Please visit my Facebook page for positive messages.
My Twitter Page:
www.twitter.com/barrysarner Need another dose of positivity? Please visit my twitter page.
My Linked-in Page:
www.linkedin.com/in/barrysarner Please come visit me here and read additional articles that I’ve written and see what my day job is all about.
My blog is about building a powerful “two way” success support community and your participation is respectfully requested, needed and greatly appreciated.
Warm Regards,
Barry
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